Writer's Block: Oh no not I
Jul. 26th, 2010 07:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tabular_rasa[Error: unknown template qotd]
I was three years old, in my first year of preschool. I don't know where people get this idea that middle school is when peer pressure and girl-style passive-aggressive bullying really kicks in. Third-grade girls can be cruel, backstabbing bitches, and even three-year-old girls are capable of ostracism and manipulative queen bee behavior. This was the case with a girl in my preschool class; she was a like a prodigy of girl-bullying, a miniscule Regina George. Every few days, she would pick a new girl in the class that everyone was supposed to ignore and make fun of. People were so afraid of being the bullied one that they didn't dare question her. I caught on to this bullshit pretty fast and refused to associate with or even respond to her or anyone else who followed her.
I can only barely remember it happening, but my mom reminded me about it years later. She said that she was informed when my preschool teacher phoned her up fretfully to inform her she thought I might have antisocial problems because I wasn't playing with the other kids. (The teacher had not realized what was going on in her classroom-- fail). My mom had heard me talk about the situation, though, so she knew what was really going on. She was apparently really impressed that I had the strength to play alone rather than succumb to the pressure to condone bullying.
I'm impressed with myself too, I guess. I seldom have a problem just walking away from people who treat me badly, choosing to be alone rather than with people I don't respect or don't like. Peer pressure has been a complete non-issue my entire life; in fact, using underhanded means to pressure me is only going to make me dig my heels in and resist more. However, this trait only applies near strangers and acquaintances; I often wish it extended to established friends. I still have trouble walking away from people I love and trust once they've hurt me, even if they've hurt me badly enough I really shouldn't love or trust them anymore. They still don't manipulate me into doing things against my principles, but I often remain loyal to people who don't deserve it.
And if that is too passive to count as "standing up" for myself, at age three I also had an incident where a girl at my other preschool (I went to a church preschool in the morning and YMCA swimming/gymnastics preschool in the afternoon) kept taunting some kids (myself included) in my class with the "Baby, baby, stick your head in gravy" chant. It was stupid but it was clearly meant to be mean and get people to cry, so I informed my mom about it. She didn't think much of it; she laughed and then told me the end of the chant, which I didn't realize had a second part. So the next time the girl said it, we were all sitting down in a big circle on the mat for story time or a Spanish lesson or something. I retorted back loudly in front of everyone: "Wrap it up in bubble gum and send it to the Navy!" and glared at her. She looked very shocked and stopped the chanting at people after that, because she obviously hadn't heard the second part either and clearly I was better at this game than she was. (Lol, it's like I won a rap battle or something >.<).
Edit (8:01 pm): And now I'm thinking about preschool. Despite a lot of mean kid bullshit, preschool was actually a pretty good time. There are some things about preschool I would go back to. (Does anyone else remember preschool vividly enough to feel that way? I feel like I'm rare for thinking this-- or being capable of thinking this). Like snack time, "swimming" just to play around in the water, and events like Green Eggs and Ham Day, Making Playdough Day (I always got to add the salt), and Circus Day (even if I refused to dress as a clown like all the other kids and so my mom had me wear a sign that said "I am a giraffe"). Good times man, good times.
I was three years old, in my first year of preschool. I don't know where people get this idea that middle school is when peer pressure and girl-style passive-aggressive bullying really kicks in. Third-grade girls can be cruel, backstabbing bitches, and even three-year-old girls are capable of ostracism and manipulative queen bee behavior. This was the case with a girl in my preschool class; she was a like a prodigy of girl-bullying, a miniscule Regina George. Every few days, she would pick a new girl in the class that everyone was supposed to ignore and make fun of. People were so afraid of being the bullied one that they didn't dare question her. I caught on to this bullshit pretty fast and refused to associate with or even respond to her or anyone else who followed her.
I can only barely remember it happening, but my mom reminded me about it years later. She said that she was informed when my preschool teacher phoned her up fretfully to inform her she thought I might have antisocial problems because I wasn't playing with the other kids. (The teacher had not realized what was going on in her classroom-- fail). My mom had heard me talk about the situation, though, so she knew what was really going on. She was apparently really impressed that I had the strength to play alone rather than succumb to the pressure to condone bullying.
I'm impressed with myself too, I guess. I seldom have a problem just walking away from people who treat me badly, choosing to be alone rather than with people I don't respect or don't like. Peer pressure has been a complete non-issue my entire life; in fact, using underhanded means to pressure me is only going to make me dig my heels in and resist more. However, this trait only applies near strangers and acquaintances; I often wish it extended to established friends. I still have trouble walking away from people I love and trust once they've hurt me, even if they've hurt me badly enough I really shouldn't love or trust them anymore. They still don't manipulate me into doing things against my principles, but I often remain loyal to people who don't deserve it.
And if that is too passive to count as "standing up" for myself, at age three I also had an incident where a girl at my other preschool (I went to a church preschool in the morning and YMCA swimming/gymnastics preschool in the afternoon) kept taunting some kids (myself included) in my class with the "Baby, baby, stick your head in gravy" chant. It was stupid but it was clearly meant to be mean and get people to cry, so I informed my mom about it. She didn't think much of it; she laughed and then told me the end of the chant, which I didn't realize had a second part. So the next time the girl said it, we were all sitting down in a big circle on the mat for story time or a Spanish lesson or something. I retorted back loudly in front of everyone: "Wrap it up in bubble gum and send it to the Navy!" and glared at her. She looked very shocked and stopped the chanting at people after that, because she obviously hadn't heard the second part either and clearly I was better at this game than she was. (Lol, it's like I won a rap battle or something >.<).
Edit (8:01 pm): And now I'm thinking about preschool. Despite a lot of mean kid bullshit, preschool was actually a pretty good time. There are some things about preschool I would go back to. (Does anyone else remember preschool vividly enough to feel that way? I feel like I'm rare for thinking this-- or being capable of thinking this). Like snack time, "swimming" just to play around in the water, and events like Green Eggs and Ham Day, Making Playdough Day (I always got to add the salt), and Circus Day (even if I refused to dress as a clown like all the other kids and so my mom had me wear a sign that said "I am a giraffe"). Good times man, good times.
