Writer's Block: Forgive and forget?
Oct. 26th, 2009 07:38 pm[Error: unknown template qotd]
I can forgive, but I never forget. Basically, once the issue is resolved (but it has to be resolved), I try to move on in my relationship with the person as if the offense in question never happened-- but I will be cautious never to leave myself vulnerable to the same offense again. I will bring up the supposedly buried issue with them if it becomes relevant again, too. The more intimate my relationship with someone, the less likely I am to hold an actual grudge; I'm more likely to nurse one against a stranger, an acquaintance, or a professor I see once a week than a teacher I see every day, a friend, or a family member.
Actually, I tend to hold grudges against things and abstractions more than I do people. If a commercial makes me cry or offends me, I will not buy the product. If I try out for a play and don't get a part, I refuse to go to see the play. And of course I am never doing business with Bank of America ever again.
I can forgive, but I never forget. Basically, once the issue is resolved (but it has to be resolved), I try to move on in my relationship with the person as if the offense in question never happened-- but I will be cautious never to leave myself vulnerable to the same offense again. I will bring up the supposedly buried issue with them if it becomes relevant again, too. The more intimate my relationship with someone, the less likely I am to hold an actual grudge; I'm more likely to nurse one against a stranger, an acquaintance, or a professor I see once a week than a teacher I see every day, a friend, or a family member.
Actually, I tend to hold grudges against things and abstractions more than I do people. If a commercial makes me cry or offends me, I will not buy the product. If I try out for a play and don't get a part, I refuse to go to see the play. And of course I am never doing business with Bank of America ever again.