I AM FUCKING UNABLE TO SLEEP
May. 12th, 2005 06:59 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tabular_rasaI am going absolutely fucking insane.
I haven't slept in three days, now. Three days. That means NO sleep. None. I slept badly, sure, for all of this week . . . but last night, the night before last, and the night before that were HELL. The most sleep I get is closing my eyes for about like two seconds and then spinning over because I'm not comfortable and then everything goes rushing around inside my head and I can't get comfortable and my breathing gets too fast and then I just can't sleep.
Last night was the worst. I remember looking at the clock every hour of every hour of the night.
I woke up (ha ha ha-- more like Mom came in and turned on the lights on over my already awake body) and started crying, and when I got out of bed I teetered all over the place. My senses are extremely sensitive and everything PISSES ME THE HELL OFF!!! It's even worse than yesterday, when I swear I almost ripped the lips off that one kid who wouldn't stop blowing through them so they flap and make a stupid noise. I am going to snap on someone. I am going to fucking turn around and beat the shit out of them, and then burst into tears and crumple to the floor and curl up and rock back and forth and just cry.
I am going to be crying all the way through this damn AP Economics test. It doesn't even matter any more; I'm going to fail it straight up. I did shitty on all my AP tests this year. God, I hate them so much.
I am bringing a pillow along just in case I am possessed to sleep there. That's all I really want, now.
I would stay home, you see, but there is no point. It's not like I can sleep here. It's not like I'm actually sick. I'm not contagious; I'm just FUCKING UNABLE TO SLEEP. It's not like I'm going to fall asleep at the wheel; I'm just woozy. Plus . . . what would be the point of staying home? It wouldn't cure anything. I can do it all at school just as easily as I could at home, AP Economics test nonwithstanding. At least at school, I can not waste $82 or $84 or whatever (well, define waste . . . ), and I can still get senior exemptions. Maybe I'll just curl up in a corner and cry quietly so no one will be interrupted by my absolute insanity.
You see . . . this is why I can't have some shit-ass roomate in college.
I haven't slept in three days, now. Three days. That means NO sleep. None. I slept badly, sure, for all of this week . . . but last night, the night before last, and the night before that were HELL. The most sleep I get is closing my eyes for about like two seconds and then spinning over because I'm not comfortable and then everything goes rushing around inside my head and I can't get comfortable and my breathing gets too fast and then I just can't sleep.
Last night was the worst. I remember looking at the clock every hour of every hour of the night.
I woke up (ha ha ha-- more like Mom came in and turned on the lights on over my already awake body) and started crying, and when I got out of bed I teetered all over the place. My senses are extremely sensitive and everything PISSES ME THE HELL OFF!!! It's even worse than yesterday, when I swear I almost ripped the lips off that one kid who wouldn't stop blowing through them so they flap and make a stupid noise. I am going to snap on someone. I am going to fucking turn around and beat the shit out of them, and then burst into tears and crumple to the floor and curl up and rock back and forth and just cry.
I am going to be crying all the way through this damn AP Economics test. It doesn't even matter any more; I'm going to fail it straight up. I did shitty on all my AP tests this year. God, I hate them so much.
I am bringing a pillow along just in case I am possessed to sleep there. That's all I really want, now.
I would stay home, you see, but there is no point. It's not like I can sleep here. It's not like I'm actually sick. I'm not contagious; I'm just FUCKING UNABLE TO SLEEP. It's not like I'm going to fall asleep at the wheel; I'm just woozy. Plus . . . what would be the point of staying home? It wouldn't cure anything. I can do it all at school just as easily as I could at home, AP Economics test nonwithstanding. At least at school, I can not waste $82 or $84 or whatever (well, define waste . . . ), and I can still get senior exemptions. Maybe I'll just curl up in a corner and cry quietly so no one will be interrupted by my absolute insanity.
You see . . . this is why I can't have some shit-ass roomate in college.
