Apprehension Before College
Aug. 23rd, 2005 09:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tabular_rasaI am so exhausted.
I was busy today, as well as rather depressed. I saw Kristina and Tiffany again, each for the (yes, yes it actually is, finally, lol . . . ) last time. Kristina and I went and ordered our Black sisters t-shirts, which I have to pick up all by myself tomorrow after four-- which sucks, because Mom wants me to drive the car to the lake tomorrow to drop it off, and probably early. I don't really want to explain to her about the shirts. There's no point, and she'd just scoff at us and roll her eyes and be stupid about it unnecessarily-- but I can't think of any other excuse except that I need to go to the bank and then pick them up then, but I could go to the bank earlier in the day, and she probably expects this. Gaa . . .
This is really the only time I ever lie . . . when the lie serves the same purpose as the truth but only takes half as long (and half as much grief) to explain . . .
I went over to Tiffany's and we watched the Totally Spies movie (yes . . . yes we did, lol . . . ), and then swam for a real brief while. It was the last time I'll ever be in their house. Ever. Man . . . Tiffany just saw her house for the last time. That is crazy. Her mom has to be out by the 21st-- and she's moving all alone, too. That's crazy, too.
Tomorrow will be so weird . . . I'll be all alone . . . it just hit me that absolutely nobody in the world would possibly call me at this moment, tonight. That's just so weird. It's not that it bothers me . . . it's just weird.
Mom doesn't work tomorrow . . . which means she'll be stressing about the house and I'll have trouble going to get my shirts tomorrow . . . grr . . .
I'm still so scared, guys . . . what if people don't like me? There is nothing in the world I fear more than people disliking me. It's even worse than tornados, atomic bombs, religious fanatics, or even phones. All of those I can face as long as I have friends with me . . .
I was busy today, as well as rather depressed. I saw Kristina and Tiffany again, each for the (yes, yes it actually is, finally, lol . . . ) last time. Kristina and I went and ordered our Black sisters t-shirts, which I have to pick up all by myself tomorrow after four-- which sucks, because Mom wants me to drive the car to the lake tomorrow to drop it off, and probably early. I don't really want to explain to her about the shirts. There's no point, and she'd just scoff at us and roll her eyes and be stupid about it unnecessarily-- but I can't think of any other excuse except that I need to go to the bank and then pick them up then, but I could go to the bank earlier in the day, and she probably expects this. Gaa . . .
This is really the only time I ever lie . . . when the lie serves the same purpose as the truth but only takes half as long (and half as much grief) to explain . . .
I went over to Tiffany's and we watched the Totally Spies movie (yes . . . yes we did, lol . . . ), and then swam for a real brief while. It was the last time I'll ever be in their house. Ever. Man . . . Tiffany just saw her house for the last time. That is crazy. Her mom has to be out by the 21st-- and she's moving all alone, too. That's crazy, too.
Tomorrow will be so weird . . . I'll be all alone . . . it just hit me that absolutely nobody in the world would possibly call me at this moment, tonight. That's just so weird. It's not that it bothers me . . . it's just weird.
Mom doesn't work tomorrow . . . which means she'll be stressing about the house and I'll have trouble going to get my shirts tomorrow . . . grr . . .
I'm still so scared, guys . . . what if people don't like me? There is nothing in the world I fear more than people disliking me. It's even worse than tornados, atomic bombs, religious fanatics, or even phones. All of those I can face as long as I have friends with me . . .
